The Ultimate Fighter: Heavyweights Episode 12 Recap (Part 2)

With the final four competitors set, we are just one hour and two fights away from finding out who will face off in the live finale to become the winner of The Ultimate Fighter’s tenth season. Will Rampage have a representative in the final, or will it be an all-Team Rashad final? Furthermore, will we see any more ridiculous teases of a Kimbo Slice re-entry, or can we finally accept that the guy lost weeks ago? Read on to find out!

Rampage suspects that Brendan Schaub will “punch and run” against Marcus Jones, which seems like a plausible strategy, and Jones reassures Rampage that “I can move if I have to”. Then, we see Schaub working out, and he appears to be working that exact strategy in practice.

Some very tame shenanigans take place, as Rampage and Tiki grab some large pink teddy bears and various stuffed animals to decorate Team Rashad’s dressing room with. Business actually picks up afterward, as they go to the extent of painting the locker room pink and adding a disco ball, as well. Okay, I spoke too soon, this is a good prank. Much more imaginative than peeing in someone’s food, right?

At the house, everyone is picking on Zak Jensen, with James McSweeney writing “Lindagay” on the side of his head while he sits there. Scott Junk advocates Jensen smacking one of the antagonists upside the head with a frying pan at a random moment, but Jensen appears to be taking it all in stride.

Then, Rashad and company discover the “improvements” made to the locker room, and everyone pretty much ends up laughing. Then, McSweeney realizes that he has to warm up in the room, and is slightly less amused. Overall, though, they take the whole thing well.

At practice, we see the guys working out, as Rashad predicts an “all-Team Rashad final”. Nelson feels he can beat McSweeney wherever the fight goes. McSweeney notes that Roy has never been knocked out, but he doesn’t think Nelson has ever faced anyone with the level of stand up that he brings to the table. Ha ha! Ummm…perhaps James hasn’t heard of Andrei Arlovski?

Back at the house, Jensen is finding refuge in the bathroom, while McSweeney, Sims and others have fun at his expense. They decide to trap him in the toilet, and this is not going to be good, as Jensen is apparently claustrophobic. McSweeney lets him out, but Jensen comes forward with kicks and punches, before the two grapple and McSweeney traps him in a standing guillotine, asking him again and again whether he is going to calm down. He even had the foresight to take his microphone off, but afterwards, he decides to keep needling Jensen, who just wants to be left alone. “I hope Roy kicks the shit out of him,” Jensen says.

Then, Rashad shows up at the house to help McSweeney get ready for his fight in a way that doesn’t involve bedroom sparring. Come to think of it, “bedroom sparring” makes that encounter sound a lot more controversial than it really was, doesn’t it? Nelson doesn’t take exception to the special attention, as he mentions that Rashad isn’t really his coach. A moment of unintentional hilarity ensues, as coach Trevor Wittman decides to do some sort of rhyming pep talk (“when you have your hands wrapped tight, for this big-ass fight”) for McSweeney that I really can’t do justice in this space, but that was ridiculous on several levels.

Now, the fight is about to begin, as referee “Slick” Steve Mazzagatti gets us started. Roy takes the center, but isn’t throwing as McSweeney dances around him and keeps his distance. McSweeney starts to look for bigger punches, and lands a nice body kick to Roy’s considerable gut. Both are throwing heavy shots now and then, but not much is landing. Roy is having a hard time reaching McSweeney. Roy shoots in and gets his neck trapped against the cage, but there’s no way McSweeney will tap him with a standing guillotine. Roy breaks free and steps back and the two stand in the center again, with McSweeney landing a nice leg kick, and a jab. Nelson is moving forward more aggressively and landing some shots now, including a nice one two with a right hand that rocks McSweeney a bit.

Nelson moves in and takes McSweeney down, landing in half guard and immediately controlling McSweeney’s right wrist. Nelson tries to trap McSweeney’s right arm with his knee and does. He appears to be working for the same “crucifix” position that he got with Kimbo, but McSweeney is a little more well-versed on the ground. Still, he is able to get the position and land some nice shots to McSweeney’s forehead. In a virtual replay of the finish to the Kimbo Slice fight, Mazzagatti steps in, as Nelson lands a number of shots, while McSweeney can’t seem to get out of the position.

Like most of the fighters that go far in the competition, McSweeney is undeterred by his loss and vows to come back stronger. Dana says he is finally impressed with Nelson, though he didn’t do anything that he didn’t already show he could do in his first two fights. Okay, though. Nelson may have been a bit upset about Rashad backing McSweeney after all- “Are you gonna be in my corner for the next one?” he asks Rashad when he is congratulated backstage.

The show couldn’t end without our 137th Rampage-Rashad confrontation, and Rashad calls Rampage and company “bitches”, which makes Rampage unhappy. They again get in each other’s faces and talk over one another while repeating themselves and insulting each other’s breath. Rampage says, “treat me like a bitch right now” about three dozen times. Rashad dares Rampage to “throw it”, but Rampage won’t take the bait. Now, we’re clearly in a situation where neither guy can back off and sacrifice his manhood, but neither one has anything left to say. Sigh.

I loved the confrontations earlier, but they are actually getting tiresome now. It’s almost as if they’re just going through the motions, like the shit-talking version of a married couple who doesn’t really feel the love for one another anymore, but feel obligated to have sex on their anniversary. For what it’s worth, for a second there, it looked as if Rampage would have liked nothing more than to swing at Rashad, and I’m almost surprised he didn’t. I mean, this is a dude that took his SUV off-roading on a crowded sidewalk, Grand Theft Auto style.

Rampage sums up his feelings about the following semi-final, “if Marcus makes the final, I’ve got a chance of wiping that smile off of Rashad’s face”. Yes, Rampage, because that’s what it’s all about. In a way though, maybe it’s a good thing that Rampage has actually bought into the “coach vs. coach” hype, while others have downplayed it much more. Also, it’s worth noting that Rampage looks downright small in the cage with Jones. “When Marcus wins, I win,” Rampage says. Sure.

Brendan Schaub says, “Game plan for Marcus is just to stick and move,” surprising no one. “I don’t see this fight lasting long.” He thinks if Marcus gets hit in the face, “he’s going to be in trouble.”

Jones and Schaub enter, both looking ready. Referee Josh “The Bull” Rosenthal is our official for this one. Immediately, Jones rushes forward and takes Schaub down, landing in half-guard, then passing explosively to side mount. Jones has been watching Roy Nelson tapes and is trying to trap Schaub’s right arm with his legs, but can’t make it happen. Schaub regains half-guard, but Jones then passes swiftly to mount. Very impressive. Schaub tries to buck Jones off, and almost does, allowing him to get half-guard. Also quite impressive.

Schaub is able to push Jones away and stand up, landing nice shots to Jones, but Jones lands a huge knee to Schaub’s dome in return. Schaub tags Jones with a big right, though, and follows him to the mat, pounding away at an obviously-out-of-it Jones for several seconds before Rosenthal steps in. It’s disappointing for Jones, but if there’s a silver lining, it’s that Rampage won’t be happy about it. “It feels good to shut Rampage down, but it hurt to see Big Baby lose like that,” says Rashad.

Jones thinks he may have had his last fight, which is pretty sad, if true. He says he doesn’t want to put his wife through the stress anymore. Jones is happy that he had the opportunity, but says that “now it’s time for me to move on”. Rampage says that “if this event wasn’t televised” he probably would have cried. Oh, man. Keep ‘em coming, Rampage. This is great stuff.

So, Schaub will face Nelson in the finale in just three days, which I’m sure doesn’t please Dana White. However, White does get to take a shot at “the worst physique in sports,” which he says belongs to his new nemesis. And that’s a wrap. We do get news that in addition to the matchup that’s worst kept secret in the sport (the Kimbo-Houston Alexander fight), we’ll be seeing Marcus Jones fight against Matt Mitrione. It’s good to see that the big guy is giving it another shot.

Be sure to come back in a couple of days for our previews and post-fight analysis of the live finale of the tenth season of “The Ultimate Fighter”!

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